That’s So Fetch - A Pop Culture Blog

There has been quite the quandary around the TSF offices (a.k.a. my apartment) over the past few weeks.  I’ve been discussing with friends and co-workers and debating the actual lyrics to the chorus of Seal’s 1995 smash #1 hit “Kiss From A Rose“.  I was obsessed with this song growing up.  As well all remember, it was the theme song to Batman Forever and dominated pop radio for like 3 years.

What we don’t realize is that some of us are most likely singing the song completely wrong.  It is arguably one of the most popular lines in music history:

I compare you to a kiss from a rose on the _____ ?

Common sense would easily deduct that the word “grave” is the only plausible word that could end that sentence.  It makes the most sense, right?  It certainly does.

Please note that Seal has never posted the lyrics to his songs.  Thus, when you search for Seal’s lyrics, every source you find will be a guess to what he is saying.  Some websites say “grey” and some say “grave” … so that was of no help to me.

I have been pleading my case that Seal is actually saying “I compare you to a kiss from a rose on the grey“ - and I will tell you why.

The first line of the song is “There used to be a greying tower alone on the sea…”

Upon my interpretation, this song is referring to a woman who has entered his life and has become a bright spot in what once was a gloomy existence.

There used to be a greying tower alone on the sea
You became the light on the dark side of me.

He goes on throughout the entire song proclaiming to this woman that she has lit up his life.

A light hits the gloom on the grey
… The light you shine can be seen

Grey is a term that is usually used to define something that is depressing or sad.  Also, grey is the color that is a transformation of white to black.  Her light is “white” and is casting onto his sadness and slowly changing his grey to white.  She is “casting” her light (happiness) onto his grey (depressing) existence, in which he refers to himself as a “greying tower” in the song.

That may be reading a little too far into it, but let’s take a listen to the actual song and listen to how he finishes the word grey (or grave) in the chorus.  In my opinion, he never sounds out the consonant sound of the “v”.

I decided to make this less of a guessing game and dig for some facts.  I pulled a few strings and sent out a few emails to a couple of people who know Seal personally.

First, Seal’s manager in London.  I have deleted his name and email from this screen shot due to privacy reasons.  You are just going to have to trust me.  When asked about the actual lyrics to “Kiss From A Rose“, this was his response:

Pretty nice for my first try.  He actually asked Seal - which is great and all - but damn it, sounds like he’s going to the grave with this one (pun intended) unless they are actually going to put lyrics up on his website, which would make this whole post moot.

Second, we have Shane Alexander, a friend of TSF who has toured with Seal.  Here was his answer, which is indefinite and still a guess:

Needless to say, I am pretty sad that I couldn’t find the actual answer.  I went on to email the co-writer and the producer of the song, but nothing came up.  No emails back - nothing.

I hope to find the answer.  Until then, you will never hear this song the same now that you know about this misheard lyric.  You’ve been saying it “grave” for the last 13 years, haven’t you?

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I’m going to try and make this review as painless as I can.  In other words, I will try - if possible - to leave out political propaganda and bias to give you a fair assessment of a movie with a political storyline.

Like most of you, when I first saw the trailer for W., the new Oliver Stone film starring No Country For Old Men’s Josh Brolin as George W. Bush, I immediately assumed it was another Hollywood politically biased film that would belittle and consistently berate our current president.  While I have no problems with the Michael Moores of the world making such films, Stone’s latest effort is a respectable biopic.  Although not perfect at times, it’s a factual representation of our Commander In Chief and allows the audience to enter George Walker Bush’s world before and during his presidency.  From his college years at Yale and his struggle with Alcohol, to the constant disapproval of his father and his reluctant delve into Texas politics.

What sets this movie apart is its uncanny ability to make the audience sympathize with Bush - who throughout the majoriy of the movie is portrayed as the protagonist to George H.W. Bush’s antagonist.

The acting is superb with possibly the exception of Condoleezza Rice’s character, who seemed a bit off in her impersonation.  All of the usual suspects are in the film including Karl Rove, Colin Powell and Dick Cheney (portrayed impeccably by Richard Dreyfuss).

I would recommend catching this one in the theater if you plan to see a movie this weekend.  Whether you are a Bush fan or not, it is a respectable representation of the life of our 43rd President.

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GUESS WHO’S BACK?

Vibe magazine recently named Eminem the best rapper of all time.  I agree one-hundred percent.  The guy is phenomenal and everyone else is trying to keep up.  His first two albums, The Slim Shady LP and The Marshall Mathers LP, will forever be two of the best albums the hip-hop genre has ever seen.

It’s also interesting to note that four of the biggest rappers of all-time are caucasian.  The Beastie Boys (consisting of Mike Diamon, Adam Yauch, and Adam Horovitz) released 1986’s License To Ill which was the first hip-hop album to ever go platinum (sell one million+ copies).  Some may say “yeah, because they’re white” - I don’t care if they’re green, it’s a platinum selling rap album in 1986.  The fourth on that list mentioned at the beginning of this paragraph would be none other than Marshall Mathers, who took the hip-hop genre by storm in 1998 with The Slim Shady LP.

my personal favorite Eminem song, “Superman“

Eminem is back after a four-year hiatus and the complete story is told in his new 200+ page memoir chronicling every step of the way.

The book kicks off with a prologue that provides one of the reasons Eminem has shunned the spotlight for the past few years. He describes in-depth just how difficult it has been for him to come to grips with the loss of his longtime best friend and fellow rapper Proof (Deshaun Holton), who was gunned down at a Detroit after-hours club in April 2006.

“After he passed, it was a year before I could really do anything normally again,” Eminem writes. “It was tough for me to even get out of bed, and I had days when I couldn’t walk, let alone write a rhyme.”

“I have never felt so much pain in my life. It’s a pain that is with me to this day. A pain that has become a part of who I am.”

read more HERE.

SONG OF THE WEEK

“Leave The Biker” by Fountains of Wayne

RANDOM THOUGHTS OF THE WEEK

95% of all content on television right now must lower your IQ at least one point while watching it.  For example, I found myself watching True Life:  I’m A Sumo Wrestler on MTV and Scream Queens on VH1 on Sunday night.  WTF has my life come to?  Scream Queens is like 10 chicks in a contest competing to get a role in the upcoming Saw VI movie.  I’d love to say only jackasses watch that kind of shit but then I’d be calling myself a jackass.  But seriously, only jackasses watch that kind of shit.

Sorry I was a little late with the Weekly Pop Culture Update today - I was too busy late last night watching the best team in the NFL take it to the Colts - the Tennessee Titans.

Beyonce and Britney Spears still with the top two songs on iTunes.  Hello 2001.

WHITE PEOPLE VIDEO OF THE WEEK

Them white folk is crazed.

PICTURES OF THE WEEK

The picture below is probably alienating most of my audience because there’s no way you’d get it unless you’ve seen Star Wars: A New Hope - and paid attention.  If so, then this is hilarious:

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It was all fun and games making fun of women’s faults and pointing out minor flaws
(Click here for Top 10 Types of Girls That Guys Should Avoid) - but it’s time to get serious.  Women are the most wonderful creatures on earth - they’re generally better in every conceivable way.

They smell better, have better skin, look better in jeans, have pleasant voices, are more understanding, and are caring and nurturing - to name a few.

Dudes are disgusting.  We’re hairy and sweat a lot.  I feel as though it’s much easier to point out the flaws in a man than a woman and this list is the types of guys that most girls avoid - and if they don’t, they should.

THE TOP 10 TYPES OF GUYS

THAT GIRLS SHOULD AVOID

10. The One-Upper Trust Fund Baby

This guy must always make it known that he has more money than you and that his father is the richest man alive.

While the normal person would visit their parents’ time share in Daytona Beach, the One-Upper likes to remind you on a weekly basis about his father’s chateau in the south of France.

He considers himself “self-made” because the minute he graduated college he began working for his wealthy parents.  Since emerging from his mother’s birth canal, he has had $50,000 yearly placed into an off-shore bank account.  Now that he’s “on his own”, he “works” in the family business a.k.a. sits in on board meetings and sleeps with the secretaries.  He will spend the rest of his life calling it “his money”.

9. “I Can Drink You Under The Table” Guy

To some, drinking is considered to be a sport.  It is something I have never been able to understand.  The minute the Jack Daniel’s is taken out of the cabinet, this guy likes to take off his proverbial gloves and throw down.  He doesn’t care if you’re drinking recreationally because he’s taken it a step further and a bit too seriously.

It really should be a Special Olympics event: How many shots can you take in an hour and not throw up on yourself?.  If that’s not retarded, I don’t know what is.

8. Has A Tattoo of One of the Following:

1. Jesus
2. Barbed wire
3. Something on fire
4. His motorcycle
5. Something written in a fake language (such as Klingon)
6. A shirtless woman or woman in short skirt
7. His name
8. A baked potato

OK, the last one was a joke.  But seriously, I’d rather see someone with a baked potato tattoo than one of the others listed.  A tattoo of Jesus - seriously?  A dude shouldn’t have another dude tattooed permanently on his body.  I know he was the son of god and all, but that’s no excuse.

7. The Scarf-Wearing, Pipe-Smoking, Ivy Leaguer

He’s so much smarter than you.  He graduated with Honors from Dartmouth with a philosophy degree.  There’s something about a pipe that makes a guy look untrustworthy.  When I picture a guy cheating on his wife he’s seducing his mistress in a log cabin with leather-bound books while wearing a scarf and smoking a pipe - don’t ask me why.

6. The Health Freak Workout Fiend

This guy has been alluded to many times on TSF here and here.  He’s always wearing a tank top and making you feel like a fat ass when you order a steak or chicken sandwich while he’s busy counting the carbs in his house salad.  He jumps at any chance he gets to take his shirt off and he has a love affair with himself in every mirror he passes.

5. The 25+ Year Old College Party Goer

I am writing this list from the female perspective even though I am a guy - that being said, the guy who shows up to college parties when he graduated in like ‘99 needs a reality check.  It’s over, dude.  You’re 28 and working at an accounting firm in Des Moines, it’s about time you put away the boat shoes and popped collars and started hitting on the clean cut lady in HR - you can take her to some dinner parties and talk about how boring your lives are.  We can all see your receding hairline under your Corona visor and we are all laughing at you.

4. Isn’t Self-Sufficient

I’ve never met a girl in my entire life who is interested in a guy who can’t cook and clean or do his own laundry.  You will never touch a girl’s breasts if your culinary skills don’t extend beyond Mac ‘N Cheese and you don’t know to seperate the whites and the coloreds.

3. The Fashionable Male / Wears Girls Jeans

If you are a 100% straight, heterosexual male and you won’t leave the house without product in your hair and designer jeans and you can’t wear a t-shirt without a sports jacket, not only are you a complete douchebag but you are going to have a hard time finding a self-respecting woman to get down with.  There’s nothing wrong with fashion sense, but women’s jeans and a shirt that is two sizes two small is the equivalent of wearing a sign on your forehead proclaiming you aren’t interested in vagina.

Some accessories are a no-no:  bracelets, rings, earrings, stupid ass hats, knee-high leather shoes.  A woman wants a man who doesn’t outdress her.  FACT.

P.S.  What the hell is the guy in the picture wearing?  Are those high heels?  …

2. The Momma’s Boy

The mother-son relationship is one of the more interesting relationships in life.  A guy should keep his mother at an arm’s length at all times.  We all know the guy who has his mom on speed dial and can’t make a decision without talking to his mom first.  His cellpone wallpaper is he and his mom by the Christmas tree in matching sweaters and he calls his mom regarding the smallest quandries like how to remove a hang-nail.  His mom taught him how to tie a tie and find the stud.  Calling your mother for help is a major turn off to women.

1. The Uneducated Chauvinist

He has gone his entire life in denial that women have gained power over the last 50+ years.  He hates Hilary Clinton and Sarah Palin because they’re women and hates Barack Obama because he’s black.  He thinks every woman should be a housewife and doesn’t support women corporate executives.  If you can’t respect women, you will be masturbating to internet porn on your death bed.  Write that down.

Like this list? check out these:

Top 10 Chick Repellent Items of 2008
Top 10 Most Annoying People on Facebook

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97 PHOTOSHOPPED JOHN MCCAIN DEBATE PICTURES

see all the photos here.

NERDS REJOICE

It appears as though they are releasing The Dark Knight on Blue-Ray for the low low price of $65 … but you get a bad ass LIMITED EDITION Bat-Pod Display Case!  The Dark Knight comes out on home video (do we still say that?) on December 9th.  I hope to have a limited edition Bat-Pod under my Christmas tree this year.

VIDEO GAME ADDICTION IS SERIOUS BUSINESS

In this video a young British child is “addicted” to the popular video game World of Warcraft.  They refer to his addiction as an “illness”.  You’ve got to be kidding me.  Playing a video game hours on end is not an illness.  I can name like 500 other things I’d rather have wrong with me than playing a video game too much.  I love how he changes his accent though when he talks in the game … I LOL’d ….

 

MUST LOVE JAWS

TITANIC 2 : THE SURFACE

 

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WE MET THROUGH CRAIGSLIST

Oh do I love the internet.  Someone send Al Gore a thank you card.  What we did before Google and YouTube I don’t even know.  How did we look up information?  The library?  That sounds painfully awful.  The only bad thing about the internet is it gives uneducated and naive people with too much time on their hands a voice.

But then - out of left field - something so simple yet so entertaining is discovered.  Craigslist’s “missed connections” gives soft-spoken people with a self-aware cowardice the chance to reconnect with a girl/guy they saw perusing the cereal aisle or the buxom blonde who smiled back at them at the airport. “Casual encounters” gives people still living in their parent’s basement the opportunity to meet other nerds over coffee - or some weird request like dressing up as pirates and recreating scenes from Ron Howard movies.

I would really like to know the average IQ of these people.  Instead of posting anonymously on the internet about some chick you missed out on, how about you work on your interpersonal skills?

I’ve decided to post a couple “greatest hits” - the most embarrassing of the embarrassment.  Naturally, I feel like they are all going to be lame but there really are a few gems here.

For more “missed connections” and “casual encounters” visit Craigslist.com for your city.

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GOD PREFERS ATHEISTS

pretty funny…
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via www.mrwiggleslovesyou.com

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THAT’S POLITE

 

“Breaking up over e-mail is a social no-no.

But sending an e-card telling someone to get tested for STDs may be a public health courtesy.  Since 2004, a free Web site, inSpot.org has allowed users to anonymously notify their partners to get tested for STDs.

The electronic cards deliver the news in a variety of styles. Some are flirty: “You’re too hot to be out of action. I got diagnosed with an STD since we played. You might want to get checked too.”

Some are somber: “Who? What? When? Where? It doesn’t matter. I got an STD; you might have it too. Please get checked out.” [via CNN]

TOP GEAR NOW ON iTUNES

My favorite show from Britain, Top Gear, is now on iTunes.  It’s basically 3 dudes with a lot of time on their hands to do things like turn normal cars into Limousines, race each other to the north pole on dog sleds and in 4-wheel drive trucks and more…

“This season features a transcontinental trip to find the world’s best driving road, a drag race between a Bugatti Veyron and a Euro fighter Typhoon Jet, man versus machine experiments and weekly power tests featuring the world’s most exotic super cars like the Caparo T1.” [via iTunes]

RANDOM THOUGHT OF THE WEEK

What’s the deal with tipping at Sonic Drive-In?  I frequently get a drink there and they walk like 15 feet to hand it to me through my car window.  It’s a $2 drink.  Should I tip this person .50 cents for bringing me my drink?  That’s like a 25% tip.  I always feel bad when they bring it to me and I ask for change back - as if they are expecting a tip every time I go.  If it’s under $5, I don’t think I should have to tip these people.

KATY PERRY EATS IT (literally and figuratively)

You gotta watch this all the way to the end.  Not only is her voice an atrocity to the musical art form but she makes an ass of herself on national television.  Just lip sync - seriously - people have been doing it for years for a reason.

PICTURES OF THE DAY

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