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TOP 10 CELEBRITIES WHO NEED TO GET THEIR ASS KICKED

I’m sure that each of these “celebrities” are relatively nice people.  I wouldn’t want to necessarily kick all of their asses - it’s more like I’d rather see someone else kick their ass - like a midget or a paraplegic nine-year-old.  Can you imagine anything more degrading than getting your ass kicked by a midget?  Anyways, I left chicks off this list because, call me old fashioned, it just doesn’t seem right for a dude to openly discuss kicking a chick’s ass.  Am I right?

Some of these dudes are a combination of annoying, lame, and lacking in any talent.  Some of these dudes have insane talent, but still need to be punched in the face.  Their annoyance factor weighs heavy in this list.


TOP 10 CELEBRITIES WHO NEED

TO GET THEIR ASS KICKED


10. JOHN MAYER

http://thatssofetch.com/images/mayer.jpgJohn Mayer has a lot of talent with a guitar in his hand, but too bad life exists outside of music.  I cringe every time I hear “Your Body Is A Wonderland” and hear this jackass sing his songs of fake love.  Then the whole Jennifer Aniston thing and his unwatchable show on VH1 that lasted all of two seconds.  He’s the definition of arrogance.










9. CHRIS MARTIN

http://thatssofetch.com/images/martin.jpgColdplay is the best worst band of all-time.  They make pleasing music, but it’s overplayed and way over appreciated.  Coldplay isn’t even one of the top 50 bands of all-time, yet some people love to proclaim them as the Gods of rock after only 4 albums.  Chris Martin named his son Apple and his demeanor is highly obnoxious.  Apple.









8. JUDE LAW

http://thatssofetch.com/images/law.jpgJude Law’s acting sucks.  Jude Law’s accent sucks.  Jude Law’s voice sucks.  Jude Law’s hair sucks.  You get the point.












7. RYAN SEACREST

http://thatssofetch.com/images/seacrest.jpgI’m not going to lie to you people - sometimes I like Ryan Seacrest on American Idol.  He can be witty at some points and make the show somewhat enjoyable, but the guy just needs a good ol’ ass whoopin’.  Nothing too severe - like being bedridden for a few days.  Just a few good punches and call it a night.  His radio show is annoying and his pretty boy attitude has got to go.









6. NICKELBACK’S SHITTY LEAD SINGER

http://thatssofetch.com/images/nickelback.jpgNickelback.  Nickelback.  Arguably the worse attempt at rock music to ever reach the mainstream in the United States.  Every single song is the same.  It’s the same song over and over and over again … and then once again.  The lead singer doesn’t even deserve to have his name mentioned on this list, we’ll just call him ‘”Nickelback’s Shitty Lead Singer”.  I’d love to see this guy get his ass kicked by a nine-year-old softball team or a WNBA coach as “Rockstar” is played in the background.







5. CRISS ANGEL

http://thatssofetch.com/images/cangel.jpgThere is one reason Criss Angel cracks the top 5 of this list:  his new Las Vegas show.  I saw it and reviewed it here.  Go read that and you will understand why the guy needs to be punched in the mouth.  I can’t stand his attitude and his lame attempt to dress himself.  His show, Mindfreak, is somewhat cool, but his 15 minutes is about to be over.










4. MATTHEW McCONAUGHEY

http://thatssofetch.com/images/mcc.jpgHe really should take his shirt off more.














3. PEREZ HILTON

http://thatssofetch.com/images/perez.jpgPerez Hilton’s blog is one of the worse websites on the internet.  He’s “famous” because he has the ability to regurgitate uninteresting photos and celebrity gossip from other news sources.  His writing is awful and has absolutely no substance and his overuse of the exclamation point makes his website almost unreadable.  He’s also ugly as sin and the self-proclaimed “Queen of all media”.  I really don’t know if I’ve ever seen a less attractive human being.









2. DANIEL RADCLIFFE

http://thatssofetch.com/images/rad.jpgDaniel Radcliffe, a.k.a. Harry Potter, has gradually become more and more annoying with each passing year - and he keeps taking his damn shirt off.  I just can’t trust someone who wears a vest with nothing under it.  Tell me you can honestly look at that picture and not want to punch him square in the mouth.  If a ferret and a parakeet had an emo step-child, it would be Daniel Radcliffe.

http://thatssofetch.com/images/ferret.jpg



1. DANE COOK

http://thatssofetch.com/images/cook.jpgLet me just make a blanket statement:  anyone who thinks that Dane Cook is hilarious has a terrible sense of humor.  I really can’t think of a worse personality trait than having an affinity for Dane Cook.  He’s bearable in Waiting, but he’s arguable the worst actor of this generation.  He is the male Jessica Simpson.  His “comedy” is sophomoric and asinine.  He’s way too boisterous and loud.  I’d love to see him get punched right in the face or bite it on a skateboard.




14 Comments so far

  1. [...] That’s So Fetch has a Top 10 List of The Celebrities that Need to get their Ass Kicked. [...]

  2. Cory December 1st, 2008 9:25 am

    Not so annoyed by Matthew McConaughey, but by the rest, absolutely! I think either Spencer Pratt or Brody Jenner could go honorable mention here. How about top 10 Athletes that deserve an ass whooping?

  3. Peder Mercedes December 1st, 2008 3:39 pm

    10. yes
    9. yes
    8. yes
    7. yes
    6. yes
    5. yes
    4. hell yes
    3. yes
    2. yes
    1. yes

  4. will December 2nd, 2008 2:20 am

    11. Kanye West

  5. emily December 15th, 2008 5:07 am

    AHHAHAHAHAHAH NUMBER 2

    “If a ferret and a parakeet had an emo step-child, it would be Daniel Radcliffe.”

  6. Catalina February 21st, 2009 2:31 pm

    You all are crazy most of the people who appear in this website are very famous, I like very much jude lay also matthew mc… an criss angel so you people are insane.

  7. Patrick February 24th, 2009 3:02 am

    this list - john mayer + lil wanye= great list

  8. Danielle February 26th, 2009 11:59 am

    James blunt please he sounds like a dying cow and i always feel like he is yelling at me when he is “singing”
    and he seems like the type of person that if i looked out my window he would be there

  9. Copenhagen March 21st, 2009 2:44 pm

    whats wrong chad from Nickelback? his voice is nice.. but I can see why Criss & Perez made it on here.. you should make a new list with all top ten being Chris Brown.

  10. Copenhagen March 21st, 2009 2:46 pm

    chris brown should be on a top ten list occuping every number.

  11. Mark April 6th, 2009 1:50 am

    Oh gosh, gods of rock. Coldplay fans are weird. They like every damn track on every damn cd, and actually buy their cds at target still to “support” them. They make me mad.

  12. [...] [see Daniel Radcliffe on TSF's Top 10 Celebrities Who Need to Get Their Ass Kicked] [...]

  13. Katie July 20th, 2009 1:47 pm

    FINALLY someone who will not shun me for saying Dane Cook is the most un-funny “mainstream” comedian out there.

  14. Crimson July 30th, 2009 9:21 pm

    Where the hell is Paris Hilton -___-?

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